I want to discuss sleepovers. The late teen kind. The mixed sex kind.
In doing so, I don’t want anyone to think I’m avoiding the topic of same sex sleepovers where there may be attractions. It’s a different topic; one meriting discussion in a different post.
I’m talking the 18 year old coming home from school with their boyfriend/girlfriend for a sleepover.
Back in the dark ages, I never would have considered having a sleepover “under my parent’s roof” until I was married.
Fast forward one generation, and a sleepover under anyone’s roof seems the norm. I wasn’t around when the discussion took place, as it just seemed to happen.
And I am not a big fan.
Now I’m not being all judgmental (or am I?) I am OK with protected sleepovers before marriage, provided there is some evidence of more than a passing fling.
Years ago, a younger friend took me aside for advice on the topic. “You have to let me know how to handle it.” The best I could mumble was “stay cool.”
BTW children. When you have a friend over, you need to help the friend know how we do things, and to keep the bathroom neat. We’re all sharing here.
And I don’t particularly want to hear sharing in the next bedroom. A little decorum, OK?
So you can tell I’m conflicted on this, and don’t have the answer. You know I’m not a fan, and didn’t put out a cease and desist order. I discouraged as long as I could….and when it seemed it was longer than a fling (with a life measured in half years or more) I relented.
The best I can say is it just makes me uncomfortable.
How do you reconcile?